Our first marriage lesson: don't, under any circumstances, spend any length of time clothes shopping together (Relate probably gives that one away for free). It's quite a hard thing to acheive in Hoi An, which is basically a huge shopping mall. A very beautiful, ancient shopping mall, that's also a UNESCO world heritage site, but a mall nonetheless. Every outlet sells beautiful clothes, shoes, art and crafts, which you are obliged to see by a woman tugging on your arm pleading "laydee, you look my shop". "Obliged" being a relative term for the different sexes

Obviously, you wouldn't want to let them down, so you take a quick peek. You can pick a fabric, and then point at any item of clothing in any magazine, or make something up. They then name a price around a third of what you'd expect in Topshop, measure you, and get sewing. Three hours later you have a new wardrobe. After a few days you have to leave, because both your money and your husband's patience are running out.

Hoi an didn't hit Daniel's buttons in the same way as Celia's, but even he couldn't resist a tiny little camp man offering cheap shirts and trousers. He also managed to persuade Celia into their first game of pool together, before a Vietnamese man with far too much time on his hands came over to show us tricks.